It’s probably true, because why did I come out, unwittingly, to a roomful of strangers? Oh, and out Mr. Fernández too.
Granted, it was hardly a backwoods bar in rural Mississippi; it was room full of poets, or poetry lovers. So the chances of being asked to step outside and settle our differences with our dukes were slim. Instead, the crowd laughed and two women of our sort gave us amused smiles as they passed near to us.
Mr. Fernández was there at my bidding, reading a poem of my mother’s. One of his many talents, besides cooking and holding contrarian opinions (and things not to be discussed here), is reading poetry. So I had assigned him the poem, and prepped him to mention me and especially Iguanas. Sales are terrible—actually, non-existent….
In the course of his introduction, he mentioned Franny as his friend—this I found sweet. However, he also mentioned me as his friend—this I found odd. So I found myself, in my booming teacher’s voice, saying something like, “Sweetheart, I’m your husband!”
He looked up and over at me, grinned, and said, “yeah, we got married four years ago.” Then he went on to read—very well—the poem.
I tell you this story because of what didn’t happen—neither Raf nor I mentioned it after the incident, and nobody commented on it except the owner of the place; she thought it was great.
This is completely unlike what I went through the first time I came out. Then, I couldn’t even speak the words; I had to write a letter. That meant a wait of five days or so, during which my stomach was knotted into dreadlocks.
I also tell you the story because, for many of us, we’re not living in a roomful of poets, but the aforementioned backwoods bar in Mississippi instead. Or maybe Omaha, Nebraska, which is where Danielle Powell was attending the religious college of Grace University.
Well, all was well with Danielle: she was the first person in her family to attend college, she was close to graduation. Then, a “spiritual advisor” ratted the news to the school’s Judiciary Board: Danielle was having an affair with a woman.
They hauled her in, asked her if she was sorry, and told her that she could continue, if she submitted to a “restoration process,” lived off campus, and didn’t sleep overnight in the dorms. Oh, and they also suspended her and didn’t allow her to finish the semester.
All this is bad—what catapults the story into heinous is that Danielle was forced into coming out to her parents and family before she was ready to. And you can imagine—from the very fact that she was attending a religious school, and was the first person in her family to do so—that her family was probably quite conservative.
Danielle then decided—smart move—not to go back to Grace; she found another college to attend. But guess what? Grace told her she has to pay 6300 bucks to get her transcript transferred to the other school.
Why the $6300? Here’s what the Huffington Post said:
James (Executive Vice President of Grace University) said anyone who withdraws before the semester is 60 percent complete will usually owe a balance, because federal law obligates Grace to return Title IV funds -- federal grants, loans and work-study funds -- on behalf of the withdrawn student. "Suspension or expulsion constitutes withdrawal," James said in an email.
Right—so the school suspends her, and then pours a little salt into the wound, forcing her to pay $6300 for it all?
Oh, and by the way, notice to whom the school is repaying: the federal government. So Uncle Sam is giving money to schools with religious scruples (their term) or which practice hate and blatant discrimination (my term!) Yeah? That’s where the taxpayers’ money is going?
Well, I looked it up, Grace University, and immediately had Mathew 6:12 flashed into my eyes. And then came across this:
Grace University has a long-lasting reputation of developing servant leaders for the home, the church and the world through excellence in biblically-integrated education. Here students receive a life-changing experience in a personal and discipling environment, all for the glory of God. Review the links below to learn more about our history, educational goals, beliefs, and more.
Biblically-integrated? Discipling?
Danielle is fighting back, along with her wife—the couple married in Iowa. There’s an online petition asking Grace to forgive the debt. I’ll certainly sign that, and my start one on my own.
How about denying federal funds to any institution that practices discrimination in any form, including sexual orientation?
