Showing posts with label Mitt Romney. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mitt Romney. Show all posts

Monday, April 8, 2013

The Colors That Run

Well, we’re seeing the true colors of our Congress, and guess what? It’s not red or blue, but green. The green that lives in your wallet, not on the trees.
The polls all say the same thing—somewhere around 80 to 90% of the American people favor background checks for anyone buying a gun. So naturally, Congress is going to have to act, to get right up there at the head of the parade, to wave that flag around and pass that legislation that is more popular than motherhood, right?
Lawrence Lessig, the guy in the clip below, might say no. Or he might say that the answer is very simple: look at the money the NRA spends on Congress versus the money the gun-control groups spend.
Well, I know the answer to that one—and here it is, courtesy of the Washington Post. 
Congressmen and women spend up to fifty percent of their time on the first priority of any politician: getting reelected. And all too often that means money, preferably big money, because look, are you going to spend hours trying to get a 10-buck donation? Remember Mitt Romney and the famous 47% remark? He made it in a room full of people spending 50,000 bucks a head. That’s 100,000$ a couple, plus parking and the babysitter.
Well, we certainly saw Mitt in his element, but the bad news? That’s every politician’s element. But until we all get together and force change on Congress, we’ll keep getting what we’re currently stuck with: the best Congress money can buy.
Consider this fact from POLITICO.com: “the top 0.07 percent of donors are more valuable than the bottom 86 percent.”
Well, I’m sure at this point you must be scratching your head and saying, “don’t bring me problems, bring me solutions!” And I’m happy to say that Lessig argues that there are solutions out there—varying proposals to empower the small donors and lessen the power of super donors. I’m all for it, as well as for bringing back the hand-counted, paper ballot.
Question is—which to do first?

Friday, March 15, 2013

An Effin' Hero

How much money was there in the room?
Well, every guest was coughing up $50,000 a plate, and there were—from what you can see in the video—at least twenty people in the room. And if there were thirty, or forty?
Right—so Mitt Romney, the Republican presidential candidate in 2012, was going to walk away from the fundraiser with a million or two bucks in his pocket. And that night he decides to let his guard down—he’s among friends, after all, people who think like him, dress like him and act like him. You know, guys you see on the golf course.
The bartender, of course, or the waitresses or the other people that serve and cook and clean—well, they can be ignored because they don’t have the 50,000 bucks that the rest of us do to spend on a dinner and to meet the next president of the United States, and press the flesh, and get the picture taken. The bartender, the wait staff—they don’t count.
Well, it was a fatal mistake for Mitt Romney. Because the bartender, a husky late-thirties middle class guy from Boston named Scott Prouty, had brought a camera in, and was videotaping the whole thing.
What Mitt said created a firestorm. Mitt wasn’t going concern himself with the 47% of Americans who are always going to vote for Obama because there’s no way to get their votes. They’re victims who think they’re entitled to food and clothes and health care. And on the word “entitled” Mitt’s voice jumps a third (in musical terms) and resonates with all the petulance, the entitlement, the astonished horror of a socialite confronted with a maid asking for a raise.
Especially because those victims, those leeches, don’t know how the rest of the world works, but Mitt does. He’s been to China to see the factory with the attached dormitories, and he’s even been inside one of the dormitories to see the one bathroom for ten rooms, and each bedroom has twelve girls in it, and they’re all saving money, those girls, hoping to get married. Here, he breaks off, and asks his audience—“well, you’ve all seen it, haven’t you?”
Murmurs of assent.
And what about that gate, with the barbed wire fence? How can they imprison those girls?
A good story-teller, he puts in the conflict, the moral uncertainty.
Ahh, but the gate isn’t to keep the girls in, but to keep other girls, girls with no jobs, from trying to sneak in and start to work, hoping to get paid.
This, of course, is familiar ground for liberals. We decry Nike for producing tennis shoes half a world away for $2.75 and then selling them to us at the mall for 85 bucks. Nike, in turn, releases a photo of hundreds of Indonesians thronging in front of a new factory, eager to make 60 cents an hour in a country where the norm is 20 cents.
My answer to this argument?
Buy your shoes at Marshalls. And try not to buy until you really need something—we can’t keep consuming like this.
Well, Mitt had been over there looking at a company then called Global Tech, which made small appliances, and sought customers who were looking to outsource their production.
OK, it’s been two years now since Wal-Mart decided to send me on my way, so I was a little rusty. But what that means, I recalled, is that the Sunbeam toaster you hold in your hands at Wal-Mart is no longer made in Georgia, or wherever it domestically was. Now it’s made in China. But what do you care, because it’s cheap and that’s great because the only job you can get is a waitress / a maid / child care because there are no manufacturing jobs because they’re all over in China and so you’re broke so you gotta buy the product.
That’s our world, now—see?
Well, not everybody’s world, of course. Mitt, when he was CEO of Bain—and also that little holding company in the tax haven of Bermuda, Sankaty High Yield Asset Investors LTD—owned over 10% of Global Tech. And when you put that money down, you’ll want to go over and see how things are run, right?
So Mitt’s gone over to see the company, and to see how the rest of the world works—how Chinese girls will work 10 hours a day for a pittance while Mitt’s own countrymen, well, just about half of them are victims who think the world, or at least the United States government, owes them a living! Hah!
The guy behind the bar doesn’t see it that way. He grew up in Boston, he knows about the rich, the guys with the prep school that leads into Harvard that leads everywhere. He sees a rich guy who decides he wants to be president, so we all better stand back and let him.
And he has it on tape. So is he gonna erase the tape, or put it out there? And if it’s out there, he’d better get ready for some serious flak, because the Republican right is not gonna forgive him.
He checks out the Chinese angle, and comes across David Corn’s article on Global Tech in Mother Jones Magazine. Prouty realizes—Mitt has been lying all throughout the campaign, demanding a retraction from the Washington Post when they said that Bain had bought equity of firms that were devoted to outsourcing production.
Prouty starts losing sleep—hey, why should he stick his neck out, run the risk of losing his job or getting slapped with a law suit, or just having right wing crazies track him down and make his life miserable.
Well, he looks into the mirror one night, and doesn’t like the guy peering back at him. “You’re a coward,” he says, and then goes off resignedly to bed. Between coward and hero there’s an intermediate persona—the reluctant hero.
He contacts Corn, who properly checks it out and at last tells him, he can’t go forward with the story without knowing Prouty’s name. Silence on the line, and then Prouty reveals himself.
As he revealed himself two nights ago, when the rest of the world was looking at a new pope. And sure enough, even as he was speaking, people had found out where he lived, they were milling in front of the house. Prouty has received threats, and has set up a defense fund—he’s had to consult several lawyers.
Hey, let him tell the story, as reported in a Mother Jones article “Scott Prouty 47% Legal Assistance Fund….
After going public, I've received a flood of physical and legal threats in emails and tweets. People have found my address and have shown up at my door. It's possible I may have to move. And I've had to contact several lawyers and have incurred legal expenses. I might incur more going forward. I always knew that if I talked about this, I could become a target, and I don't want to be melodramatic, but some of the threats I've received do cause me to be concerned for my safety and that of my loved ones.
I appreciate all the support I've received from the beginning—and especially now. Many people have asked how they could help. This is one way. I've also said in interviews that if they would like to show their support they can send donations to the ASPCA and the Institute for Global Labour and Human Rights. These are both groups that I care about.
I'm hoping that I don't need to spend a lot of money on lawyers and security. If people are generous and there are any funds left over after these costs are covered, I would use the remaining money to pay for going back to school. I've been bartending for eight years and I'd like to move forward with a job that lets me help others. If I end up not using these funds for education, I will donate them to the SPCA and IGLHR.
Ummm—Scott?
Scott, honey, you need to face something. You cannot be giving this message about the ASPCA and the Institute for Global Labour and Human Rights.
The right wing crazies are gonna go after you. The guy who organized the fundrasier, according to Mother Jones, is a billionaire who can easily afford the lawyers’ fees that will have you twisting in the wind for years to come. You’re gonna have to come out with a message—simple, clean and direct. Here it is:
They’re after me. They know I helped keep their rich kid out of the White House and they’re furious. And I don’t have any money—what bartender does? So dig into your pockets because the fight didn’t stop, it’s still going on. I need your help.
I know, Scott, you don’t want to say it. You’d rather not say it, but you will, Scott, you will, because you know what, Scott?
You’re a fuckin’ hero. 

Thursday, November 8, 2012

Mitt Romney, Go Right To Your Room! (Reposted)


A NOTE FROM THE WEBMASTER:

Marc is on vacation, so here's a previous post (originally published on August 17th.)

À propos of Tuesday's US presidential election, I think it apt!

-------------------------------

It was a day when unwittingly I channeled Franny.

It was a story she told me once, after she had said she was being especially nice to Molly, her dog.
Why?
Well, she had scolded Molly unknowingly the day before.
Explanation?
“Well, I got up as I always do and set about the morning chores. Fed the cats, put wood in the stove, made the bed. Put Molly out to eat and do her business. Turned on the radio, and started to make breakfast. Well, the news was just dreadful that day. And that damn Bush was trying to justify his invasion of Iraq! When I think of the sympathy and good will of the entire world after September 11 and then he has to go and squander it all and invade a foreign country under the flimsiest of excuses! And the more he spoke, the madder I got. And then he got stuck in one his sentences and couldn’t get out of it! Damn it! Well, I was pretty steamed up, and went stomping around the house….”
“So what’s that got to do with the dog?”
“Well, I went to let the dog in, and she wasn’t in sight. Then I saw her, crouching under the porch. So I stormed over there and demanded ‘WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!’ And she just whimpered. So I looked around. No trash anywhere, so she hadn’t gotten into that. No smell, so she hadn’t rolled in anything. Just stood there with her tail between her legs, looking at me with those brown eyes….”
“Right…and?”
“Well, I realized then.  I…um…had been talking to George Bush….”
Those who knew her will understand. She could get up a head of steam.
And so can I. Rather, so did I.
Why?
Mitt Romney said yesterday that he had never paid less than 13% in taxes.
WHAT!
Here’s what I said:
YOU’RE AN ASSHOLE AND YOU HAVE JUST LOST THE ELECTION AND I AM DAMNED MAD AND DAMNED GLAD. I MADE 35, 000$ DOLLARS LAST YEAR AND I PAID 14 PERCENT ON IT! AND YOU HAVE THE FUCKING GALL TO TELL THE AMERICAN PEOPLE THAT YOU PAY THAT MISERLY 13 PERCENT ON YOUR FUCKING QUARTER OF A BILLION DOLLARS! 
And then…
YOU KNOW, MY FATHER WAS A REPUBLICAN, BUT HE WASN’T ANYTHING LIKE THE KIND OF SLEAZEBAG YOU ARE! HE BELIEVED IN SMALL GOVERNMENT AND FISCAL PRUDENCE AND THE PRIVATE SECTOR AND PAY-AS-YOU-GO AND DON’T SPEND MONEY YOU DON’T HAVE. RIGHT! SO DO I! 
Cat looks up, interested…
AND THAT’S THE WAY I RAN MY LIFE WHEN I HAD A LIFE AND HAD A JOB AND GOT UP EVERY FUCKING MORNING AT 5 AM AND WENT TO WORK. BUT YOU KNOW WHAT, MITT! MY FATHER WOULD BE ASHAMED OF A PARTY OF RICH JERKS WHO ARE FILLED WITH HATE FOR ANYBODY LIKE THE HUNDREDS OF IMMIGRANT KIDS WHO ARE FILLING CHURCHES IN LOWER MANHATTAN TO APPLY FOR LEGAL STATUS AND MAKE A BETTER LIFE FOR THEMSELVES. WHO DEREGULATED THE BANKING INDUSTRY SO THEY COULD MAKE MONEY FOR THEMSELVES AND THEN THREW US INTO A DEPRESSION, WHICH PARTLY COST ME MY JOB! WHO CAN’T STAND A BLACK GUY IN THE WHITE HOUSE! SHAME ON YOU!
Storm into the kitchen, cat follows!
I could go on but…look, you get my drift.
I’m better today. I took my rain walk, and sure enough, sought refuge under one of the balconies when the predicted downpour arrived. I listened to Haydn. And then I channeled Jack.
Where’s the press? 
With about three keystrokes, I figured out the federal tax rate in 2011 for a guy making 35,000 bucks a year.
15%.
What part of this don’t people get? Don’t people know how much they pay in taxes?
“I’m not paying anything this year,” my students would say in relief on April 15.
Wrong—you’ve been paying through the nose all year. You just aren’t gonna get slugged extra.
So what am I gonna do? 
Or what are we gonna do?
Here’s my plan. Dig out your tax forms for the year 2011. Redact them—you don’t want those jerks playing around with you social security number. And when Mitt comes to town? Go to the rally wearing a big placard, with your annual salary and your tax rate written on it. 
And wave your tax returns at him. Let him take a look at what real people are paying.
Oh, and Mitt?
Go to your room. Don’t come out until you’re ready to say you’re sorry!

Monday, November 5, 2012

The wrong grass

In about twenty-four hours, I will be standing—and likely sweating—in a cardboard box, marking my ballot. I’ll fold the ballot, and drop it in a cardboard box. My finger will have been checked to assure that it hasn’t been dipped in ink. The polls will close, and members of all political parties will count by hand the ballots. They will all sign off on the vote.
Here’s the good news—we have elections as clean as mountain spring water.
Here’s the bad news. My cousin in Norway voted for president by absentee ballot.
Nothing to do with being Puerto Rican—Raf could vote in Florida and Wisconsin when he lived there. But—so goes the rationale—since Puerto Rico doesn’t pay federal taxes, we don’t get to vote in federal elections.
Goes a little beyond that. It seems that we are not protected by the entire constitution.
Seems a bit Orwellian, doesn’t it? Some of us are more equal than others….
What we can do, however, is shed blood for our country. And we have consistently, since the First World War. It was startling to me, when I first realized the nature of the scheme.
Our political and ruling classes trade the blood of poor Puerto Ricans for American greenbacks, many of which go into their pockets.
This is a level of cynicism I didn’t expect.
Nor is it a trivial question.
Remember W.?
You wouldn’t, if we had voted in 2000.
And now we got a guy running for president who doesn’t believe in global warming, despite the fact that it’s not just been studied but is now being lived. Try getting to the bottom of Manhattan by subway.
Oh, and it’s been a week since the storm.
We got a guy and a party that would turn back time about half a century on women’s rights and gay rights. We got a guy whose grandfather was a polygamist and who pretty much thinks the same way gramps did.
Nancy votes, Marc doesn’t.
Well, well—no one reads a blog to hear a rant. So here’s the good news.
It turns out that bamboo creates the same degree of fanaticism as the UFO guys and the JFK conspiracy freaks
Friends, we’ve been growing the wrong kind of grass!
Our lawns are ecological disasters. We turn the lakes green due to the fertilizers we have to put on the lawns. They require enormous amounts of water. You can’t eat it.
Bamboo, on the other hand, consumes pollution. It can grow anywhere except in deserts. You can eat it. It can grow, in optimal conditions, three feet a day! And it can be used in construction, as a food for chickens (the leaves) and most importantly, for fuel.
Africa is losing a lot of forest—people are cutting trees for fuel. Bamboo, on the other hand, makes a decent charcoal, and grows back quickly. Trees, once cut, are gone.
I think it’s a tremendous idea.
Now—why can’t I vote?

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Romney and FEMA

Well, there I was, last evening, enjoying my fleeting fifteen minutes of fame, when Mitt strode into the room.
OK—it just felt that way. Is it just I, or does anyone else hear the repressed petulance of a guy wishing for the 1950’s who knows in his heart they’ll never come again?
Mitt, as you can hear, wants to send the responsibility of cleaning up after disasters back to the states, and preferably the private sector.
My first question—what do the experts say? Is there anybody out there that thinks that’s a good idea? Are all disasters alike or can some be dealt with at the state level while others require a centralized / national organization? Would we really save money, or would we just be sticking the tab on the states?
Well, in an effort to be fair—that father of mine is still lingering around somewhere—I did a brief google on the topic. And guess what?
Still don’t have the answer!
There is a guy, however, who makes a case for privatization in the case of disaster response. And he adduces a little company I know something about.
Wal-Mart!
Right—Wal-Mart’s finest hour was in response to Hurricane Katrina.
Anybody remember FEMA’s response to hurricane Katrina?
Or that “heck of a job” that “Brownie” was doing?
Well, while Brownie was answering emails or shopping for shirts, Wal-Mart was giving away ice-cold water to people who needed it.
Good business strategy, really. Lady in the shop across the street did the same for me, after one of our hurricanes, and am I gonna buy cigars anywhere else?
Nope!
Right, and I’ve had a little experience with FEMA, too. Well, actually, I’ve not. But my students have, and the reports were hardly raves.
Also true, of course, that NOBODY is happy after a disaster. There’s something about not showering for two weeks, sweating bullets as the mosquitoes dive-buzz your ear at 2AM, and not having a hot meal for a fortnight that sours the mood.
But hey—wait a sec. Before we privatize our disaster response, there’s something we ought to consider.
Wal-Mart is perhaps the most centralized company in the world.
Want an example? When a freezer in the Bayamón store goes above a set temperature, an alarm is activated in Bentonville, Arkansas, and a technician there calls the store—as he or she will call ANY store, anywhere in the world. At this moment, Bentonville is monitoring freezers in China.
Bentonville, as well, is monitoring the weather. It’s got its own meteorologist—nice guy, we exchanged emails once—who said metaphorically to New Orleans what I said actually to my brother John.
“You’re fucked….” 
So since they have a very efficient (and very centralized) logistics system, it was no problem to put the trucks with that cold water in a nice high-and-dry spot.
OK—so we’re at the point of asking: which is better, the (probably centralized) private sector or the public sector? Does business do it better? Does the profit motive increase efficiency to the point that we save money AND get better results?
Well, Mitt, I grew up in the fifties and sixties in a little town that worked. Nobody except the Catholics paid for private schools, nobody had gated communities, you could drink the water. And government did all that, or regulated the industries that did. And everybody grumbled about their taxes, but assumed automatically that if you called an ambulance, one would come.
It was efficient, it was clean, and the press kept an eye on things, as did an educated populace.
Well, maybe those halcyon days weren’t quite as lustrous as remembered. But I got a question.
Why am I suspicious of rich guys who want to privatize everything? I bashed FEMA, a few paragraphs up.
Anybody remember Halliburton?

Sunday, August 26, 2012

Strategy Time!

OK—time for confession. I spent hours yesterday trying to figure out what a blocker corporation was.
Even asked Mr. Fernández, who for once wasn’t quite certain.
And this guy—besides always having the answer (and always the correct one, damn him!)—has an MBA.
Right. So a reasonably intelligent guy (that’s me) and a very intelligent guy (that’s you-know-who) with an MBA can’t figure out the basis for Mitt Romney paying 15, not 35% on his millions.
Or is it 2%?
Well, just googled it again, and guess what?
Can’t get my head around it.
I did learn some interesting facts. Seems that there are two things. Tax evasion is illegal and very, very bad. There is something, however, called tax avoidance and that is legal and very, very good! (Especially for the rich…)
See?
And it appears that blocker corporations are legal. So, I thought, what about me? Can I set up a little blocker corporation? I’m living down here in the Caribbean. Easy enough to run up to Grand Cayman, file some papers, then head for the beach! Supposed to be nice up there.
I think you know the answer.
No.
You gotta have mega bucks to do this scheme. And for little pubic hairs (can’t say the word in Spanish—it’s obscene…) like me?
Sorry. Find another playground.
Well, well. What to do?
Clean the bathroom, I decided. For Carmen was coming to dinner, and it seemed like a thing to do. Can’t have a dirty bathroom if ladies are coming to dinner.
Right, did that. Then dawdled around the rest of the house. Got it half clean when Carmen, ever punctual, showed up.
So we sat, ate dinner, and talked death.
Well, she’s a lady who knows a thing or two about death. Both of her parents AND her lover died virtually in her arms. 
Parents died at home, and were, in good traditional fashion, waked at home as well. Yup, just like the famous (in Puerto Rico at least) painting by Oller. Have a look….
 
And of course, she prayed the rosary. Still does, though Carmen is only culturally Catholic. Which is to say that she (probably) disagrees with 80% of the dogma but gets comfort from praying the rosary.
Who am I to criticize?
She believes, for example, that a green butterfly appearing in the house portends the death of someone close to her. Well, I thought, she’s not alone. Japanese also think so. And I was forming that thought, or rather that sentence (we were speaking Spanish) when Carmen went on to say…
“…it’s such an honor, a privilege, to be present when someone you love dies….”
And then, the heavy mirror hanging over the buffet moved rhythmically back and forth three times.
And no, there was no wind.
Also, not one but I saw it.
Not surprising, really. She’s here and there, that mother of mine. She gets around. No smoke detector, so she grabbed the mirror. 
Well, I did the dishes, Raf and Carmen went off to see a play. Got up and did the morning trot. And began wondering.
How to get through the week? There’s a nest of vipers gathering in Tampa, and what to do? Turn off the iPad / television / newspaper completely, and clean the house?
Music, I decided. And then began thinking of music about music. And that led, inexorably, to Handel. 
Well, it’s a strategy. Not a bad one. So I went to YouTube, and snatched the clip below.
But for stronger souls, click on the link below, and see if you can understand Mitt’s money….
Just don’t tell me until after next week….

Saturday, August 18, 2012

When a Man Becomes a Swan

Well, even I can’t keep it up forever.

There’s a limit to how much storming around I can do, how much moral outrage I can generate, how much rant I can produce.

Time to move on.

Which is not to say that I get it. Romney was governor of Massachusetts for four years from 2003 to 2007. Top federal tax rate is 35%. The guy must have been in the top bracket, right? I mean, being Gov has gotta pay better than Burger King, right?

Mental hygiene, Marc….

I admit it, the tail of the hurricane is still producing a few gusty winds. I considered starting a little business. T shirts!

Here’s the first:


OK, try this:


And for the truly tasteless:


Well, well. I considered starting a little competition for readers of this blog. Who, in the next week, can create the funniest, most mordant t-shirt? But we gotta move on. Can’t be spitting nails all our lives. So take a look at this:


Friday, August 17, 2012

Mitt Romney, Go Right To Your Room!

It was a day when unwittingly I channeled Franny.
It was a story she told me once, after she had said she was being especially nice to Molly, her dog.
Why?
Well, she had scolded Molly unknowingly the day before.
Explanation?
“Well, I got up as I always do and set about the morning chores. Fed the cats, put wood in the stove, made the bed. Put Molly out to eat and do her business. Turned on the radio, and started to make breakfast. Well, the news was just dreadful that day. And that damn Bush was trying to justify his invasion of Iraq! When I think of the sympathy and good will of the entire world after September 11 and then he has to go and squander it all and invade a foreign country under the flimsiest of excuses! And the more he spoke, the madder I got. And then he got stuck in one his sentences and couldn’t get out of it! Damn it! Well, I was pretty steamed up, and went stomping around the house….”
“So what’s that got to do with the dog?”
“Well, I went to let the dog in, and she wasn’t in sight. Then I saw her, crouching under the porch. So I stormed over there and demanded ‘WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!’ And she just whimpered. So I looked around. No trash anywhere, so she hadn’t gotten into that. No smell, so she hadn’t rolled in anything. Just stood there with her tail between her legs, looking at me with those brown eyes….”
“Right…and?”
“Well, I realized then.  I…um…had been talking to George Bush….”
Those who knew her will understand. She could get up a head of steam.
And so can I. Rather, so did I.
Why?
Mitt Romney said yesterday that he had never paid less than 13% in taxes.
WHAT!
Here’s what I said:
YOU’RE AN ASSHOLE AND YOU HAVE JUST LOST THE ELECTION AND I AM DAMNED MAD AND DAMNED GLAD. I MADE 35, 000$ DOLLARS LAST YEAR AND I PAID 14 PERCENT ON IT! AND YOU HAVE THE FUCKING GALL TO TELL THE AMERICAN PEOPLE THAT YOU PAY THAT MISERLY 13 PERCENT ON YOUR FUCKING QUARTER OF A BILLION DOLLARS! 
And then…
YOU KNOW, MY FATHER WAS A REPUBLICAN, BUT HE WASN’T ANYTHING LIKE THE KIND OF SLEAZEBAG YOU ARE! HE BELIEVED IN SMALL GOVERNMENT AND FISCAL PRUDENCE AND THE PRIVATE SECTOR AND PAY-AS-YOU-GO AND DON’T SPEND MONEY YOU DON’T HAVE. RIGHT! SO DO I! 
Cat looks up, interested…
AND THAT’S THE WAY I RAN MY LIFE WHEN I HAD A LIFE AND HAD A JOB AND GOT UP EVERY FUCKING MORNING AT 5 AM AND WENT TO WORK. BUT YOU KNOW WHAT, MITT! MY FATHER WOULD BE ASHAMED OF A PARTY OF RICH JERKS WHO ARE FILLED WITH HATE FOR ANYBODY LIKE THE HUNDREDS OF IMMIGRANT KIDS WHO ARE FILLING CHURCHES IN LOWER MANHATTAN TO APPLY FOR LEGAL STATUS AND MAKE A BETTER LIFE FOR THEMSELVES. WHO DEREGULATED THE BANKING INDUSTRY SO THEY COULD MAKE MONEY FOR THEMSELVES AND THEN THREW US INTO A DEPRESSION, WHICH PARTLY COST ME MY JOB! WHO CAN’T STAND A BLACK GUY IN THE WHITE HOUSE! SHAME ON YOU!
Storm into the kitchen, cat follows!
I could go on but…look, you get my drift.
I’m better today. I took my rain walk, and sure enough, sought refuge under one of the balconies when the predicted downpour arrived. I listened to Haydn. And then I channeled Jack.
Where’s the press? 
With about three keystrokes, I figured out the federal tax rate in 2011 for a guy making 35,000 bucks a year.
15%.
What part of this don’t people get? Don’t people know how much they pay in taxes?
“I’m not paying anything this year,” my students would say in relief on April 15.
Wrong—you’ve been paying through the nose all year. You just aren’t gonna get slugged extra.
So what am I gonna do? 
Or what are we gonna do?
Here’s my plan. Dig out your tax forms for the year 2011. Redact them—you don’t want those jerks playing around with you social security number. And when Mitt comes to town? Go to the rally wearing a big placard, with your annual salary and your tax rate written on it. 
And wave your tax returns at him. Let him take a look at what real people are paying.
Oh, and Mitt?
Go to your room. Don’t come out until you’re ready to say you’re sorry!